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The Home of the Cyber Shark(s)

BBBAAAAAWWWWW is the sound they make…. that's descriptive enough, right?

I am not talking about Anonymous proper, just a random anonymous person.

On my formspring I received this “question”:

“Lose some weight you weaboo scum. Fat bitch.”

To which I replied:

The only thing I take exception to is being called a weaboo. Srsly. I enjoyed anime at one point in my life and sometimes watch those anime again. I’m certainly not going to glomp you at a con.

Mostly because I don’t glomp, but also because you sent this anonymously… since you’re anonymous I don’t know who to not avoid confronting in a public area.

So, Mr. Anonymous. Gain some balls. Also a face. I think having a face would actually help you get far in life.

(linky)

Now, I could have deleted this question, or continued to ignore it: it had been flagged as potentially offensive and the only way I was made aware of it was a little red sentence that informed me I had one flagged question.

But I can’t leave well enough alone, and I’m really glad I read and responded to this question.

Because this question is very offensive.

Now, it’s not because I was called fat: I am fat. That’s just stating the goddamned obvious. Good job, anonymous, you have eyes!

For one, it’s because it commands me to lose weight, as though this person has any right to tell me how to live my life.

For another, it’s because I was called a bitch, a gendered term that makes me feel targeted as a fat WOMAN, as opposed to being a fat male.

But I want to clarify: I was not hurt by these words, oh no. I’m 26, and have been fat most of my life. I’ve put up with this name calling bull shit all of my life, so some internet troll isn’t going to cut me to the quick and make me re-examine my life, and cause me to cry at night. I was pissed off by these words.

I’m pissed off, one, because had I been a guy I don’t know that I would have received such a comment. Fat men are perfectly acceptable in our society, whereas fat women are… well… fat women have a special place in our society, in that we pretty much don’t exist if at all possible.

But more than that, because he (and I’m positive it’s a he, women are more catty and specific in their abuses) felt like the had any right to tell me what I should be. And this is not specific to me. No one has any right to bully someone, harass someone, abuse someone, force someone to act/be something they aren’t already. You see a fat person walking down the street? Keep your fucking mouth shut, it’s not your business – because you’re not saying it out of a good place, you’re saying it out of a hateful place. If you actually cared about that person, you wouldn’t insult them.

I’m 26, as I said. I’ve put up with some shit in my day, and it’s all the same, the insults. I’ve heard them all. I was even on a bus overhearing a woman complain that a fat person, who was on the bus before her, was sitting in a seat, while she, a middle-aged, healthy woman, had to stand – as though there was some unspoken rule that fat people have to move to the back of the bus* or something. These insults don’t hurt me anymore, but they leave me with a lot of anger, because you are all so chicken-shit, that you hide behind something in order to GO OUT OF YOUR WAY to INSULT someone – how sad is your fucking life? I hope it’s really sad honestly, because you’re an asshole who deserves a shitty life – not because you called ME fat, but because you are going out of your way to hurt people. You are the people who talk loudly in the girls’ room while you think it’s empty, the ones who pass notes and laugh in class, who stick signs on other people’s backs, who say “I know a guy who really likes you, give me your number and he’ll call you”, who gang up on someone with a group of friends, who shout from their cars, or post things anonymously on the internet, all so that you can hurt someone’s feelings and not have the chance to take it back. You. Cowards.

And I’m glad I’m angry at this, since it shows me how far I’ve come, but what bothers me more is that there are people in high school, getting the same, or worse, abuse than I ever got, who can’t take it, who don’t know or can’t grin and bear it, who don’t have a good family life, and good friends to support them even when the world seems against them, who can’t escape into a book, or video game, who don’t have a creative outlet to get their frustrations out. And it bothers me that little assholes like this will go on to continue to harass them, and they’ll hurt themselves, and/or others.

Look, no one has to like everyone, that’s impossible. And I’m not trying to tell you how to think: you are free to think I am the ugliest motherfucker ever to walk the earth (And you’d be wrong, there are at least 3 other people more hideous than me… though they’re all burn victims with horrible birth deformities so I’m not sure it’s really a fair contest…), but what is wrong with you that you take the time out of your day, go out of your way, to make sure that I know that you know I’m hideous? Who the fuck are you? Maybe, as you suspect, hiding behind your friends, your car, the internet, that you are, always were, and always will be a nobody, whose opinion doesn’t matter.

*I realized this sounded like I was comparing the prejudice there is against fat people with the Civil Rights Movement. I’m sorry, I’m just too lazy to change the wording now, especially since it fit in with the whole literally being on a bus part of my story. Sorry again.

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